ostrich skin kwai-kwais (PUMPS)

the tale of the ostrich skin kwai-kwais........once upon a time there was this beautiful princess who live in a far away land called soweto. This beautiful princess met her handsome prince charming and they were arranged to get married. She wondered about downtown jozi the day before her wedding in search of the perfect shoe to match her beautiful gown. Her fairy dlozi led to a beautiful mystical place called Oriental Plaza where she fell in love with the most beautiful shoes in all of the lands.

And they lived happily ever after

Some of the Brands that have shaped and moulded my black ass

Paulo Coelho "The Zahir"

"when the unwanted guest arrives....

I might be afraid

I might smile or say:

My day was good, let night fall.

You will find the fields ploughed, the houase
clean,

the table set,

and everything in its place."

"we choose to stay outside, outside a world that is fast
collapsing,outside people who have live in constant fear losing something, who
walk along the street as if everything was fine , when , in fact , everything is
bad, very bad indeed! Don't you beg too? you ask for alms from your boss to pay
the owner of your apartment? Aren't you ashamed of wasting your
life?'

" ofcourse they know" replies the nomad. "How many people do you know who
say : I've never done what I wanted, but then, that's life. If they say
they haven't done what they wanted, then , at some point they must have
known what it was that they did want . As for life , its just a story that other
people tel us about the world and about how we should behave in the world"

" Finally he explained that suffering occurs when we
want other people to love us in the way we imagine we want to be loved,
and not in the way that love should manifest itself- free and untrammelled,
guiding us with its force and driving us on."

"He died while he was still alive"

"Marie, lets suppose that two fireman go into a forest to put out
a fire. afterwards, when they emerge and go over to a stream,the face of the one
is all smeared with black, while the other man's face is completely clean, My
question is this : which of the two will wash his face?"

"No the one with the dirty face will look at theother man and assume
that he looks like him. And ,vice versa,. "

looking to the past.......

Mam' Mirriam Makeba

The Manhattan Brothers

Mirriam Makeba & The Manhattan Brothers

Hugh Masekela

Henry Cele

Fela Kuti

Busi Mhlongo

Busi Mhlongo

Brenda Fassie

Angelique Kidjo

20 and going thru a middle life crisis would be nice if I was actually debating ferrari prices

whats the point really? I ask this because I see my dad like every other hunter gatherer dad out there working 9-5 24/7 for a non existent salary and ask I myself whats the point?? if you hardly spend time with your family and the money you do make amounts to peanuts. Maybe its just my naive youthfulness talking but I don't want to be like my dad and look back at my life and see that I haven't lived out my moments but I have rather allowed the economic gods to dictate my life.

what's the point really?? I ask this because I wake up everyday with the same burning desire to live in my dreams rather then partake in the mundane groundhog day existence that I have subjected myself to. Riding in the bus last evening I realised that I have grown tired of looking outside the window at the same fucking boring view- if I see another second hand car dealership I swear I'm going to scream.....literally !!

Whats the point really?? I ask this because I spent 12 years being indoctrinated and I ,because I want to be someones employee, have subjected myself to 3 more years of further indoctrination worth R20 000 pa. I doubt this is my calling but hey I do need to be employed so screw my passion there are future groceries that need to bought and tax to be payed. Come to think of it I do have to give my mum her dream kitchen and replace all those glasses I broke.

whats the point really? I ask this because although my parents are the perfect model of love, marriage and commitment I wonder sometimes if that ish actually exist....I have the Thomas complex so I "gotta see it to believe" so I can't lean too much on faith because reality is king.So for me love is as fictional as mills & boom its just procreation and convenience. Then again I might be wrong- I hope I am.

I fear that I may have read to much into Paulo Coelhoe's the alchemist and saw myself as Santiago the Shepard who went all the way to Egypt to find his treasure only to find that the treasure was always with him.....corn straight off the cob....but it does make you wonder...

.............this life thing is gonna be the death of me!

clearing the clutter

Verbal vent: consider this my random commentary on random nothings that plague my mind. My conversations with myself and God on a metaphorical Victorian style dinner table.My Shakespeare drag (dressed as a girl) soliloquies and all the things we think but don't say because of our repulsive human need to be liked by strangers. And lastly consider this My Robert Marawa "qumshelele" on "WOOOOOzaaaa Weekend".

Purge:

_I do hate the 'she ain't shit' look that we woman give each other when we first meet- Its unfortunate that we right each other off and ultimately we miss out on a potentially great human experience purely because we are prematurely attacked by the bitchy territorial bug.

_I often ask God whether or not He exist or is He just a figment of my overactive and indoctrinated imagination. After all I did go to a Catholic primary school

_I really don't buy what these religious fanatics are selling , and its not that I can't afford it mara phrases like......'I am saved now I'm a renewed virgin'.........good for you and your newly found hallow (Mary mother of Jesus!)

_I don't appreciate confrontational homophobes-hurl your melodramatic slurs from a distance. Quite frankly someone needs to tell Fundi Vundla in a well written letter that if he wants to tackle the homosexual theme in his never ending story of a soapie the least he could do is challenge senzo & jason to pretend to like kissing each other......it is acting after all.

_I want to work for Nandos Marketing team.......Slave for Hire

_ I flipping loath these unwritten dating rules: you like me I like you so why are we acting like we are trieng to workout a formulae to solve the worlds problems. why must I call after 3 days

_Why are black guys so cheap.........it's really a genetic predisposition among the black male species pastor Mboro and Soweto TV need to intervene.

_I sometimes wonder if this Satan guy is being given more credit then he deserves hey......the whole burning for the whole of eternity thing I mean really now your already dead. Earth is already a shit fest now they are going burn you forever and ever and ever ........But this theory suggest that God and Satan are in coalition in separating the saints from the sinners

_I am a sucker for romantic comedies that are totally unrealistic in practice but in theory they are quite tantalizing.........your soul mate chasing after you at OR Tambo International Airpot reciting corny lines such as"your had me @ hello" or "I'm just a girl standing in front of a boy asking him to love me"-pull at my heartstrings why don't you.

_Racism will forever live on especially in rainbow nation after all you always have to separate your darks from your lights.But what would happen if you didn't have to follow that dumb rule???

_Sex will turn people's adams and eves into demonic cretins.....I recently overheard a conversation between two male security guards of a random university saying that "women asked to be raped".In this day and age there are still idiots who don't adhere to the MAN code of ethics-those spuds need to go to the mountain or be sent to Polsmor prison where they can drop the soap.

_Which member of the SABC staff decided haphazardly to change iJam Alley to a more expansive looking jikamajika. As a loyal fan of Jam Alley ever since Vinolia introduced idye egold to the black masses I would have at least appreciated a warning before you went 5..4..3..2..1...

SORRRY....DZU...CIMA IY'BANI!!!!

this is my purge for today.......I already feel thinner

Ukuzala ukuziyelula (to give birth is to relieve yourself)

The inspiration for this blog comes from a picture I took innocently, depicting me in a toy store holding what looks like a anti-colonial baby Jesus. The kind that one would expect to see in a nativity scene under Robert Mugabes Christmas tree.

I immediately named my vinyl bastard Grant after the Child Support Grant that has made making babies into a lucrative enterprise... And the vaginae of every rural and ghetto have been open for business ever since. Neck rolling teenage girls will bunk the SATs right when they ovulating in the pursuit of their Grant. They have this repulsive phrase: "ama-firstborn ayaphela" which in direct translation means "first born babies are getting finished". Its as if these babies have become a Rama margarine special at Shoprite and you should get one while stocks last.

Contrary to that in most South African households this R260 Grant has become the main source of income. It has been what I believe to be one of the many of the post-apartheid government's efforts to curb poverty amongst the most venerable members of society. I do commend them for that. But one always hopes that the money is actually being spent on the baby and not being spent on a rihanna razor cut at the nearest makeshift dunusa salon.

For the sole purpose of this post I wanted to share the slogan of the South African Social Security Agency:

"paying the right social grant,to the right person at the right place and time Njalo !" SASSA (South African Social Security Agency)

Honestly how archaic is this slogan Steve Bantu Biko must be turning in his shallow grave right now.

The Horn of Africa

In a plight to to give my 2 cents worth to the crisis in Somalia I have decided to make beaded bracelets in an effort to raise a few rands to at least feed a family or two. We all know what hunger feels like I can't even begin imagine how dire hunger to the point of starvation feels like. The helplessness and hopelessness that consumes a mother in between her staggering efforts to ignore her children's loud growling stomachs....must ache more than the hunger pangs.

I dedicate songstress, Sade's Pearls lyrics and writer Chinua Achebe's Refugee Mother and Child to the people of Somalia ,its of no tangible value but its something.

Pearls by Sade:

there is a woman in Somalia

scraping for pearls in the roadside

there's a force stronger than nature

keeps her will alive

that's how she's dying

she's dying to survive

don't know what she is made of

i would like to be that brave

she cries to the heaven above

there is a stone in my heart

she lives a life she didn't choose

and it hurts like brand new shoes

hurts like brand new shoes

there is a woman in Somalia

the sun gives her no mercy

the same sky we live under

burns her to the bone

long as afternoon shadows

it's gonna take her to get home

each grain carefully wrapped up

pearls for her little girl

hallelujah

hallelujah

she cries to the heavens above

there is a stone in my heart

she lives a life she didn't choose

and it hurts like brand new shoes

Refugee Mother and Child by Chinua Achebe

No Madonna and Child could touch

that picture of a mother's tenderness

for a son she soon will have to forget

The air was heavy with odours

of diarrhea of unwashed children

with washed-out ribs and dried-up

bottoms struggling in labored

steps behind blown empty bellies.

Most mothers there had long ceased

to care but not this one; she held

a ghost smile between her teeth

and in her eyes the ghost of a mother's

pride as she combed the rust-coloured

hair left on his skull and then-

singing in her eyes0 began carefully

to part it...In another life

this would have been a daily

act of no consequence before his

breakfast and school; now she

did it like putting flowers

on a tiny grave.

I tend to question whether there is God when such events take place or perhaps this its just one of God's many mysteries.......

"I was always looking for myself in the man I Loved"

why do we look for ourselves in the woman or man that we love? This question really shook me up this week because I realised that I have always searched for my true reflection in the eyes of the "latest squeeze".It's really sad to realise how sad your dependency is on others. To awaken to that fact that you rely on others to determine your sense of self........... and that is a real tragedy

I have recently came across a guy who I felt matched me in the best possible way the whole ying-to-yang thing but somehow God, the universe etc ultimately has the final say and it was a negative on that relationship. Part of life's many trials and tribulations that we as a human beings have to master and overcome in order to grow as spiritual beings.To wrestle with the knowledge that life isn't in our hands as much as we may propel ourselves to play devils advocate there is a greater mastermind shuffling the deck of cards.Its a hard pill to swallow but it does ease the pain once you aknowledge its power.

At times we need to put our egos aside and let the chips fall where they may to try and micro manage life is futile.

this post is dedicated to: a love lost and beautiful new memories......I believe when the time is perfect Our paths will cross but I think its better If I know myself before I get to know you